The ParkNo, we didn’t eat here. Honestly, spending enough time in this place to eat an entire meal seems like a soul-sucking event that we want nothing to do with. Instead, we milled around the bar checking out all the nine-to-five “beautiful people” and otherwise out of work actors and actresses suck on their Marlboros and sip their fancy martinis. We will hand it to these folks for the rather cool design of this massive space. It kind of has that Palm Springs lodge feel, with incredibly high glass ceilings, palm trees, criss-crossing wood beams and roaring fireplaces. Unfortunately, like most of its patrons, beauty is only an illusion. It’s kind of like putting a Cocker Spaniel in a $3,000 outfit. You are so mesmerized by the getup that you fail to notice that it’s being worn by a damn dog. So goes the clientele at The Park. This is a uniquely New York City phenomenon that is at its height at places like this. Even the unhappy, Prada-clad public relations maven on her 56th cigarette of the day and sixth Cosmo will tell you that it’s all window dressing. Take a stroll under one of the strategically placed pinpoint halogens and all will be revealed… Incredible people watching opportunities aside, if you’re looking to avoid places that make you feel as though the Sex and the City lifestyle is the true New York, you may want to tell Samantha Jones to shove it and take your ass to a place where actual human beings hang out. [MF]


118 10th Ave.
212/352-3313
theparknyc.com