Movies

Enjoy the rantings as Mr. Hipster proves he slept through his film criticism courses in college.

The One I Love

The One I Love

Rating:  First we start with this amazingly creepy poster. I mean, Duplass looks like a serial killer and Moss looks like some awful painting out…

Neighbors

Neighbors

Rating:  There are a lot of dicks in this movie. Like a TON of dicks. Big dicks. Little dicks. Short dicks. Long dicks. Dick, dicks,…

Melancholia

Melancholia

Rating:  I’ve somehow gone my entire life without seeing a Lars von Trier film. And, honestly, I felt as though I could have gone the…

Zodiac

Zodiac

Rating:  This one has been on my list for quite a while now, but for some reason it has eluded me while other complete pieces…

You Can Count On Me

You Can Count On Me

Rating:  I can’t say I was overly excited to watch this film the night I snatched it off of the video store shelf–despite it winning…

Y Tu Mama Tambien

Y Tu Mama Tambien

Rating:  And your mother too! I guess that’s some sort of fancy Mexican insult. I was always a fan of ‘¡la tuya!,’ but more often…

Wonder Boys

Wonder Boys

Rating:  After I finished reading Wonder Boys I signed onto IMDB to see when the movie would be coming out. No, I didn’t know a…

Winter's Bone

Winter’s Bone

Rating:  Hillbillies are funny. They’re all “kin this” and “kin that” and they all have skinny dogs chained to their sheds and cook meth and…

Whip It

Whip It

Rating:  Full disclosure: Ms. Hipster loves The Wedding Singer. That shit is on 27 times a year and she will watch it every time. Thusly,…

We Need to Talk About Kevin

We Need to Talk About Kevin

Rating:  First off, we need to talk about the name Kevin. Nothing good ever came from that name. It’s like asking for your son to…

War of the Worlds

War of the Worlds

Rating:  I hated it better when it was called Independence Day. Wow, this thing was an utter and complete mess. Maybe my standards have become…

Wanted

Wanted

Rating:  Yeah, I liked it better when it was called The Matrix. Seriously, it’s as if they’re playing the whole movie with a wink and…

WALL-E

WALL-E

Rating:  Since when is Disney headed by Al Gore? I haven’t seen An Inconvenient Truth (cuz, uh, I haven’t gotten enough exposure to the guy…

The Wackness

The Wackness

Rating:  I had every intention of having this on in the background as I surfed and/or paid bills online. It was yet another film meant…

Waitress

Waitress

Rating:  This thing had all the earmarks of a successful indie movie. It had some marginally recognizable actors, a simple premise about simple people and…

The Village

The Village

Rating:  I must say that I was excited to see this one when the first trailers came out. It looked scary and suspenseful and smart….

View From the Top

View From the Top

Rating:  How does this crap get made? Better yet, why do people agree to star in them? Paltrow won a damn Oscar. Ruffalo has a…

Vanilla Sky

Vanilla Sky

Rating:  Where to start. Let’s start at the beginning–or is it the ending? Am I dreaming or am I awake? Am I maimed or am…

Upstream Color

Upstream Color

Rating:  Forgive me but I’m going to have a seriously hard time describing this one. I mean at least Shane Carruth’s last (and first) film,…

Unbreakable

Unbreakable

Rating:  Try as I might, I can’t pronounce M.’s last name. Maybe I’m a stooge. Maybe I’m a ‘tard. Maybe all the people who complained…

Transformers

Transformers

Rating:  Oddly enough, this was a rental request from Ms. Hipster. “Balderdash,” said I, “this summer blockbuster Michael Bay pabulum will be nothing but rubbish–pure…

Training Day

Training Day

Rating:  King Kong ain’t got nothing on me! Whatever. Never have I heard such drivel from Academy Award nominated performance. Shit, any idiot can play…

The Town

The Town

Rating:  There’s this certain genre of blue collar caper movie that’s out there that makes perfect sense in the pantheon of both tough guy character…