The Highlawn

This is where the fancy people come to sup. Which I’m told by Mr. Burns is an actual verb. But, hey, this is Jersey, so “fancy” is a bit of a misnomer. And, because it’s Jersey, everything looks vaguely like a wedding factory or a joint meant for a high school reunion or baby shower. Which, to be honest, is The Highlawn’s raison d’être. And, as if by edict, we showed up for our outdoor dinner to the din of a table of women and their wrapped gifts that indicated the dying moments of just such a celebration. Which is, of course, totally fine. But, like those midtown Manhattan restaurants that cater to business lunches on the corporate card, you’re going to pay. Yes, you are.

The question then becomes if the juice is worth the squeeze? Which is a turn of phrase I’ve always hated, but if you’re reading this you’re just going to have to suffer through it with me. But, let us back up a second. The actual draw here is The Highlawn’s location atop the Eagle Rock Reservation. With its classy 911 memorial overlooking the NYC skyline. And its outdoor cookouts. And its teenagers doing hand stuff in parked cars every night. And, as of 2026, tons of legal-ish weed smoke. So many people, so many cars. And, again, the smell of skunks just wafting everywhere. But, it’s the view. The spread of what looks like green NJ leading to a straight-on scene of the Isle of Manhattan’s west side. And our table, sitting out on the patio, had that exact view. If it weren’t for one particularly unkempt tree, it would have been completely unobstructed. Pretty cool, but is a view good enough to make an evening?

Well, that all kind of matters if you like the grub you get at a catering hall. Which is usually serviceable, of course, but you’re not typically paying for it, so… My first nit is the fact this joint cares so little that they let their website domain expire, and don’t currently (as of July 2026) have an active site. That’s super-weird and doesn’t speak to a level of care I look for in my establishments. Especially ones that definitely depend on people booking parties or group reservations. But, for me, it’s just inconvenient trying to track down an active menu to see what I’m getting myself into. But, as it turns out, it’s basically American and seafood. And cocktails, of course.

I started with a cocktail. A boulevardier, to be exact. It was fine, but drank a little watered-down and not as intense and bitter as I’ve typically had them. I think it was $19 or so. I then got French onion soup. Because I was feeling schizophrenic and, despite it being summer, the wind was whipping up a little and the sun was starting to dip, so a little heat wasn’t going to be an issue. They did a decent job with the cheese — there was plenty of that — but the punch of the broth, like the boulevardier, was just lacking any meaningful meaningfulness. They chose reasonably generic white to float in there bread, and the onions in the French onion soup were just lacking. Overall, it was a decent facsimile, but not a great example of top-notch soupery. It too was $19. For my main I got something called Chitarra Vongole. Or something like that — because, as I mentioned, an updated menu doesn’t exist online. It amounts to some spaghetti with small clams in a light garlic, white wine and olive oil sauce. Sauce being a pretty generous term for what it is. Was it light? Certainly. Were there some clams? Indeed. Was the pasta cooked correctly? It was. Did the combination of said clams, said pasta and this super-light “sauce” amount to much more than a bland bowl of what felt like buttered noodles and salt? Not really. Again, not offensive — I happen to like oil and salt — but also not worth the $36 or whatever they charged for it. I’m not really a dessert guy, but Ms. Hipster was interested in the chocolate cake of some sort, so we split that. It was not very memorable. Not like the sundae our meal mates ordered, which looked more like an ancient-Roman-era bowl of ice cream than a sundae.

This is all to say that Ms. Hipster had been espousing the idea of rolling up to The Highlawn for a drink and the view and maybe some bar snacks for years now. But we’d never done it. Now we have — sort of. I think that maybe a full meal here off their fancy menu isn’t necessarily the best way to celebrate a joint that basically exists because of its view. It feels like maybe the next time we’ll just order a couple overpriced cocktails and survive on the nuts at the bar (which I honestly doubt is a thing). Or split a pizza off their bar menu. It’s just, unless you’re here for an event of some sort, it feels a little overworked and overpriced for what you get. Our server was a sweetheart at least. No, he really was. For once, I’m not being a sarcastic asshole. That is all.

1 Crest Dr. – West Orange
973/731-3463