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The Blogger Bash

by mr. hipster March 20, 2015
March 20, 2015
Cat Lady Blogger
82

Don’t ask me why, but I went incognito to The 14th Annual Big Apple Blogger Bash last night. Well, incognito in the sense that everyone else had nametags and I walked around sans identifier, and only introduced myself using my first name (kinda like Roseanne or Madonna). When asked if I had a blog, I told the honest to God truth–and looked the person straight in the eye–when denying having anything even resembling a blog (whatever that is, my expression said). I was there to support my buddy Paul in his quest to find NYC’s hottest blogger. I saw right away that this was going to be a tough job.

Let’s back up, though, shall we? I was a little wary about going to this thing to begin with, and my fears were only amplified when I showed up to the bar and my chaperone was nowhere to be seen. I looked around wondering what a blogger looked like. I always imagined your typical blogger to be swathed head-to-toe in kitty clothes, or maybe donning a spiffy Deep Space Nine uniform. Honestly, I had no idea what to expect, but I knew I was scared. Then, I got my first look at a real, genuine blogger! Unfortunately he approached and asked me if I was Aaron (I assume this is the Aaron to whom he was referring.) I nicely informed this little blogger man that I wasn’t Aaron and that I’m sure his blog-date would be there soon. He took his seat, and I looked for a corner in which to hide.

My tour guide to this twisted little land of criminally obsessive typers finally showed up and escorted me into the side room that was filled with a strange breed of sticker-bearing minglers. I passed on the tag and sidled up next to what appeared to be a group of small effete Asian men. They were fiddling with what looked like the most expensive digital camera ever produced on this Earth, and chirping about blogginess (to coin a phrase). My escort decided this was the time to drop the “I’m just looking for the elusive hot chick blogger” line. He then introduced me as the man who was going to baby-sit him in his inebriation and disallow any after-hour canoodling of any non-humanoid creatures. The cold wind blowing through the bar at that point had nothing to do with the fact another emo kid in horn-rims had joined the crowd from frosty 9th Avenue…

Needless to say, it seemed it was time to move on to some folks with a little better sense of humor. I literally turned and ran into a guy who has the same job I did in a different division of Random House. This threw off my whole game. It was like running into your boss while exiting a Hooters in Wichita. You know, it’s not as if you’re doing anything wrong by being there, but it’s kind of hard to explain why you’re walking out of a misogynistic wing joint in the middle of city you have no business being in.

As it turns out, I only spoke to one other blogger in my short time there, and she (despite being younger than the James Worthy t-shirt to which I often refer) was a pleasant, charismatic character. I elected to skip talking to the few Lisa Loeb look-alikes and UUTV rejects to concentrate all my efforts on not bursting into tears at the humanity of it all. Seriously, I wish I had the stamina to keep up some sort of daily writing ritual, but I have this wacky thing called a job that takes up a large portion of my day (a problem I have a feeling more than a few of the blog constituency doesn’t have to worry themselves over) and I really don’t think anybody wants to hear about how my cat threw up its Tender Vittles or how the gob of ear wax I pulled out of my head last Thursday kinda looks like James K. Polk.

My luck, some dude who attended the bash will take my light-hearted ribbing the wrong way and will start the “I’m Gonna Kick Mr. Hipster’s Ass” blog, where every day he will document a different way he’s gonna kick my ass. Come and get me blogboy!

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      Behind the Bastards

      February 13, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Time Crisis

      January 26, 2024

  • Booze & Grub
    • Booze & Grub ReviewsBooze & Grub: NYCBooze & Grub: NJThe NYC Booze & Grub GraveyardThe NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Tinga Fresh Mexican & BBQ

      July 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Falafel Hut

      July 12, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      McDonald’s (West Village)

      July 10, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      McDonald’s (West Village)

      July 10, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Westville Hudson

      April 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Five Guys – Midtown West

      January 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Jaz Indian Cuisine

      December 23, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Just Salad – Hudson Square

      November 13, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Tinga Fresh Mexican & BBQ

      July 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Falafel Hut

      July 12, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      August 9, 2022

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The Press Box Restaurant & Pub

      August 3, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Natureworks – Midtown

      May 6, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The National Bar & Dining Rooms

      April 10, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Hillstone – Midtown

      March 5, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Connolly’s Pub & Restaurant – 5th Ave.

      February 12, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      July 21, 2024

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Scala del Nonna

      February 15, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Diesel & Duke – Montclair

      January 30, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Ruthie’s Bar-B-Q & Pizza

      September 14, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Junior’s Cheesesteaks & Shakes

      December 21, 2020

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Vanillamore

      June 13, 2020

  • Randomness
    • Travel Reviews
    • Video Game Reviews
    • Product Reviews
    • Odd Finds
    • Diary