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Product Reviews

Bissell Pet Hair Eraser Handheld Vacuum

by mr. hipster September 22, 2020
September 22, 2020
207

Bissell Pet Hair EraserWe have a cat, ok? And, no, I’m not a cat person. I grew up with dogs. Cats are for old ladies and bachelors who think having a cat makes them more attractive to the opposite sex. Hint: they don’t. But when you work a lot and don’t have a fenced in yard and don’t really like walking around in “weather,” you get an animal who basically lives on the couch. Plus, these damn kittens seem to grow on trees. And often find themselves falling out of them onto the streets of Elizabeth where they’re hopefully rescued by the likes of us.

Anyhow, because the thing lives on our couch, so does his fur. Our particular feline also seems to have some sort of sinus problem that causes him to drool a little when he’s sleeping. This vacuum, the Bissell Pet Hair Eraser Handheld Vacuum 33A1, doesn’t help with that, unfortunately. But what it’s really good at is getting cat hair off of that microfiber material.

I used to spend tons of time with a standard canister vacuum trying to get the damn hair off of our furniture. To no avail. But this little handheld thing — which is weirdly shaped like a mouse — has a rubber nub attachment that just hoovers the stuff up. It’s kind of magic, honestly. I try to throw a blanket down where the cat beds down for the night, but often forget. So I just plug this thing in in the morning and zip-zap-zoop, a couple passes with this vacuum and it’s good as new. The spit stains are still there, of course, but at least the giant spot that looks as if a cat exploded is gone.

It’s very rare that a product actually does what it says it does. But this one does indeed “erase” hair. It’s kind of ridiculous that I need a whole separate device just to pick up pet hair, but the $36 or so I spent on it on Amazon has been worth its weight in gold. So skip all those wacky, expensive attachments for your regular machine and just pick up one of these wonders. It’s a terrific investment for those of us who don’t love constantly sitting in the wake of our dumb cat’s follicle output.

Shecky Cat

Hipster Cat (aka “Shecky”) does his best to test the vacuum’s validity.

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