Upper West Side

Yogi’s

Yogi’s

[CLOSED] We’re not quite sure what the obsession is with New Yorkers and redneck bars, but here is the UWS’ entry. Complete with a jukebox…

Yippie Yi Yo

Yippie Yi Yo

[CLOSED] We’ve walked by this joint a thousand times. To be honest, we walked by it not only because the name is completely retarded, but…

Westside Brewing Company

Westside Brewing Company

[CLOSED] Welcome to all the blah the UWS has to offer. It’s no wonder this neighborhood has garnered a vanilla image and squeaky-clean, prepster attitude….

Tenzan

Tenzan

Eating on the second floor in Manhattan is always a little disconcerting. It’s as if one of your buddies converted his one bedroom into a…

Señor Swanky’s

Señor Swanky’s

[CLOSED] Señor Swanky’s loosely translates in English to Mr. Filthy’s. It’s an apt name, too, as this joint is just downright dirty. It’s hard to…

Sambuca

Sambuca

[CLOSED] Another one of those extremely uninventive family-style restaurants that delivers a lot of food, but not much taste. We are constantly disappointed by these…

Ruby Foo’s Uptown

Ruby Foo’s Uptown

[CLOSED] Quote most often attributed to patrons: “Style over substance.” Upping the yuppie quotient on the UWS, Ruby Foo’s draws beautiful young couples (many of…

Prohibition

Prohibition

It is rare for Mr. Hipster to review a place in which he has never been (there’s a first for everything.) In this case, though,…

P.D. O’Hurley’s

P.D. O’Hurley’s

[CLOSED] Some might say P.D. stands for “pretty disappointing” or “poor decision,” but we here at The Survey think “positively dull” might be a more…

P&G Cafe

P&G Cafe

[CLOSED] The first thing I though was, “Shouldn’t the beers be cheaper in this dump?” Seriously, if you’re going to charge five bucks for a…

The Parlour

The Parlour

Apparently there is a restaurant attached to this Irish bar. We had no idea. That aside, this bar is actually a decent facsimile of an…

Mod

[CLOSED] What the hell are people thinking with the velvet ropes–especially velvet ropes on the UWS in a bar that nobody wants to hang out…

Merchants NY – West

Merchants NY – West

[CLOSED] When places like this start getting mass-produced we know the apocalypse is upon us. We’re not saying it’s impossible to have a decent time…

McAleer’s Pub

McAleer’s Pub

Looking for a good, honest to goodness pub that serves great burgers and a decent pint? Look no further than this UWS landmark. The jukebox…

Malachy’s Donegal Inn

Malachy’s Donegal Inn

There’s no sugarcoating it; this place is a dive. Granted, it’s a dive on the UWS and is filled with oddly preppy locals. The dichotomy…

Kitchen 82

Kitchen 82

[CLOSED] The concept behind this place is actually kinda cool. Charlie Palmer (who I originally thought was that old golfer with the funny pants and…

Jake’s Dilemma

Jake’s Dilemma

The old joke goes that Jake’s only dilemma is that he can’t get any chicks into his bar. Seriously, what self-respecting yuppie UWS woman would…

Hi-Life Bar & Grill

Hi-Life Bar & Grill

For whatever reason, this place reminds me of an old, black leather chair. I’m really sure why, but it just seems to fit. Of course,…

Harrison’s

Harrison’s

[CLOSED] 355 Amsterdam Ave. Addendum [hey, things change] Apparently Saturday nights are all about the music at this joint. Dueling acoustic guitarists sing down- home…

Happy Burger

[CLOSED] Welcome to Mel’s Diner–without Flo and that wacky Alice. Yup, it’s just Mel in his greasy t-shirt and that stupid sailor-lookin’ hat. Well, his…