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Bad Commercial: Progressive Insurance “Motaur: Gym”

by mr. hipster January 4, 2021
January 4, 2021
Progressive Motaur
76

Progressive MotaurSomeone somewhere gets an idea in his head and then, when committed to video, it’s garbage. Like straight trash. Such is the concept behind Progressive’s “Motaur.” Yes, a play on the minotaur, but instead of half man, half man, half bull this dude is half man, half motorcycle. And he’s a total and complete douche. An angry, unrepentant monster.

Presumably this is Progressive’s play for motorcycle riders. You know, to let the public know that they insure not only drivers, but riders as well. And apparently they think that all dudes on bikes will associate with this other dude who is pretty much a prick to everyone. This practically non-verbal, monosyllabic dick of a mancycle. Which, when you think about it, is super disturbing. Also, a minotaur has the body of a man and the head of a bull. This dude essentially has the lower half of a motorcycle and the torso and head of a man. How does he shit? How does he reproduce? No, seriously, does he have a working tailpipe or what? Anyhow, it seems like a weird play to paint motorcyclists as anti-social, arrogant bastards. Just sayin’.

In this episode of Asshole Motaur, he’s at the gym. A gym that is apparently the worst gym on earth. Why, you ask? Because the place only has one treadmill. I mean, I haven’t been to a gym since the turn of the century, but even in the dinky joint in my building we had at least a couple running machines. Shit, I have one in my house now. But this gym has a rowing machine, a step machine, what looks to be a bunch of weight machines, but only one stupid treadmill? The dude complaining that the Motaur is going over his time limit needs to rethink his membership.

The unrealistic man-machine and workout gear is probably the least annoying thing about this commercial, though. Watching the full 30-second spot below, you may not understand the biggest problem. And that problem — which seems to be common when agencies make cutdowns of spots — is that the thing makes no sense at all in its 15-second form. At the beginning of this 30-second spot, they start with an establishing shot of rain on the gym window, along with a vague thunder sound in the background. So we know and understand that the Motaur is inside at this lame establishment because he’s apparently too much a wimp to drive around in the rain? His bravery and whatever aside, it gives us some clue later on to the actor’s one and only line:

Tell that to the rain.

Thing is, I never saw the 30-second commercial before Googling it. They mostly show the 15-second cutdown that has no establishing shot. So unless you look very closely, you have no idea it’s wet outside. And then when the Motaur actor delivers his completely garbled line, you have no fucking clue what he says. I must have seen this ad 25 times, listening very closely each time to try to decipher his line. It’s only five words. But each and every time I had no idea. No idea at all what he says. That’s bad. How they didn’t notice when viewing and editing this thing is beyond me.

Should we also consider who the hell the gym manager is who lets a dude on a motorcycle inside? And, yes, I understand he is the motorcycle, but that doesn’t make it any less egregious. You can’t tell me he has zero emissions. Shit, humans don’t even have zero emissions. And I feel like there’s another Progressive spot where we see the Motaur fill up with gas, so the dude does burn fossil fuels. In other words, the guy who’s all bent our of shape about not getting treadmill time is more likely than not going to die of carbon monoxide poisoning anyway. So let the prick have his indoor riding time and maybe hit the free weights.

Bad Commercial
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      Band of Horses @ The Wellmont Theater

      February 13, 2024

  • Movies
    • Movie Reviews
      Mountainhead

      July 4, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Fountain of Youth

      June 24, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      A Different Man

      June 10, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Problemista

      May 22, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Flipside

      May 4, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      The Gorge

      March 2, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      A Real Pain

      January 31, 2025

  • Books
    • Book Reviews
      Trust

      June 19, 2025

      Book Reviews
      Razorblade Tears

      May 24, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Plot

      March 14, 2025

      Book Reviews
      Maximum Bob

      February 17, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Sympathizer

      January 6, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Zone of Interest

      July 12, 2024

      Book Reviews
      Klara and the Sun

      April 13, 2024

  • Podcasts
    • Podcast Reviews
      The Wedding Scammer

      March 1, 2025

      Podcast Reviews
      Search Engine

      November 27, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Hysterical

      August 30, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      60 Songs That Explain the ’90s

      March 31, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Otherworld

      February 29, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Behind the Bastards

      February 13, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Time Crisis

      January 26, 2024

  • Booze & Grub
    • Booze & Grub ReviewsBooze & Grub: NYCBooze & Grub: NJThe NYC Booze & Grub GraveyardThe NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Mambo Cuban Restaurant & Lounge Harrison

      May 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Westville Hudson

      April 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Five Guys – Midtown West

      January 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Jaz Indian Cuisine

      December 23, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Just Salad – Hudson Square

      November 13, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Quality Pizza Co. Midtown

      September 10, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Mambo Cuban Restaurant & Lounge Harrison

      May 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      SGD Dubu So Gong Dong Tofu & BBQ…

      May 9, 2025

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      August 9, 2022

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The Press Box Restaurant & Pub

      August 3, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Natureworks – Midtown

      May 6, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The National Bar & Dining Rooms

      April 10, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Hillstone – Midtown

      March 5, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Connolly’s Pub & Restaurant – 5th Ave.

      February 12, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      July 21, 2024

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Scala del Nonna

      February 15, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Diesel & Duke – Montclair

      January 30, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Ruthie’s Bar-B-Q & Pizza

      September 14, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Junior’s Cheesesteaks & Shakes

      December 21, 2020

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Vanillamore

      June 13, 2020

  • Randomness
    • Travel Reviews
    • Video Game Reviews
    • Product Reviews
    • Odd Finds
    • Diary