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The Geniuses at Fox

Where do the geniuses at Fox come up with this shit? Seriously, this is some briliantly wacky stuff. There must be a whole room full of crystal meth addicts sitting around the Fox offices thinking about how they can screw with that thing we have dubbed reality television. Who cares if it’s misogynistic or asinine? Who cares if it pushes the line of good taste and goes out its way to infuriate PETA? We’re Fox, man! We’ll have a sumo wrestler play tug o’ war with an orangutan. We’ll have a $19,000 dollar a year construction worker pretend to be a multi-millionaire to prove that woman are pretty much money-grubbing biatches after all. We’ll show drunken rednecks fall and fall and fall. Shit, we’ll even let you watch Danny Partridge beat the crap out of Greg Brady. Is there anything we won’t do? Well, we’ve never made you watch hot chicks eat pig rectum, or tortured you with the daily life of a fat, stoned former Playboy bunny with the IQ of a dead beetle.

I just can’t believe these freaks get paid to sit around with their feet up on their desks shooting Nerf hoops and dreaming up ways to screw with humanity. Okay, I know this isn’t how television development works, but there is some evil genius over there who actually greenlights shows depicting horrendous car crashes (World’s Scariest Police Chases), people being mauled by wild animals (When Animals Attack!), and obese side-show freaks eating until they puke (The Glutton Bowl).

Seriously, who needs another sitcom about some stupid family and their wacky in-laws/neighbors/friends when we can have carnage, treachery and monkeys? Thank God for the geniuses at Fox. They’re always keeping us on our toes and making us wonder what kind of crap they’re going to pull next.