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Sideways

by mr. hipster April 1, 2005
April 1, 2005
Sideways
76
Sideways
2004 ∙ Dramedy ∙ 2h 7min

I can’t even tell you how many movies have been ruined for me by that insidious devil: hype. That and seeing way too many clips and getting around to films way too late in the hype cycle. By the time the Mrs. finally convinced me to order up this one on the pay-per-view, it had been built up in my head to the point that I felt like I had to prepare and create perfect viewing conditions in order to enjoy this masterpiece to its fullest. Renting it on TV.–and on this particular night–threw me for a loop. Was I really ready to watch this universally praised film directed by the man after whom I named my only son (okay, his middle name)? I tried to wiggle out of it, but ultimately ran out of excuses and pretend ailments.

I mean this is the woman (Virginia Madsen) who fueled many an adolescent HBO-tinged night with the MPAA promise of nudity and blonde bravado. And the man who played one of the most memorable characters in TV. history, Thomas Haden Church of Wings and Ned & Stacey. Oh, and Pig Virus/Vomit himself, Paul Giamatti. Oh Christ, that annoying woman from Arliss is in this? Seriously, aside from Giamatti, these people are not exactly stars–nor do they have a history of being particularly good actors. So you have a mostly c-list cast in a movie about wine and stuff. Who ever thought this was gonna fly? Well, he’s an f’n genius!

Luckily you have an a-list director who can not only weave a yarn like few out there, but can get amazing performances out of actors who might otherwise drown in their own obscurity. The plot here is minimal at best, but the overriding feeling and intricate intermingling of wine and life is handled with delicate care. There are certainly some speeches that are a little long on exposition and are a bit on the brainy, philosophical side, but as a whole, it’s full of dialogue that makes one think about the arc of our lives and how, like wine, we go through our ups and downs and blah blah blah.

I’m not going to break down the whole thing here because I won’t do it justice, but the script is subtle enough that it shows you rather than tells you. For instance, The Breakfast Club is a “tell you” film. It comes right out and says that parents can be jerks and can really screw up their kids, and that it’s not your fault if you’re a fuck-up, it’s your parents’. That was a teen movie written by John Hughes. This is a screenplay meant for adults written by the master, Alexander Payne. It’s nice to be treated like an adult.

I guess Giamatti has found his niche as the pathetic dude. It’s not as if he’s going to get offered Superman or Conan or anything, I suppose, but he really plays schlubby and downtrodden well. His awkwardness and mopiness is almost too realistic. You just want to smack the guy and tell him to get over it. Church is still kind of goofy, and is cast well as “that” guy. You know the one; the friend who is just such a complete asshole that you can’t help but love him despite his constant string of indiscretions and selfish sidetracks. It’s like having a puppy that keeps peeing on your favorite rug. What are you gonna do?

Madsen and Oh are surprisingly good, and Oh has even continued her post-Arli$$, non-annoying streak on the TV series Grey’s Anatomy (which will probably be cancelled by the time I publish this). I’m not sure what Hollywood is going to do with Madsen, but she’ll most likely continue on in some period pieces (she has a kind of old west look), smaller supporting roles as ex-wife or mother or like some non-sexual role as like nurse or nun or someone else nurturing. Funny, as I seem to recall her playing the dangerous vixen in some movies in the 80s.

I’m not going to go on and on because this is a difficult film to really describe. It’s not going to blow your mind or make you into a better person or anything, but that’s not really what they were going for. There are no explosions (although there is a car crash) and only one ass shot (although I seem to remember that it’s Church’s), so that’s not something that you can look forward to either. Just expect what Ms. Hipster called “a good, little film” that will make you think, entertain and make you wonder why the hell almost all of the other screenplays out there suck so badly.

2004Alexander PayneDramedyPaul GiamattiSandra OhThomas Haden ChurchVirginia Madsen
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Directors

Aaron Moorhead Aaron Schneider Aaron Sorkin Adam McKay Adrienne Shelly Alan Rudolph Alejandro Amenábar Alex Garland Alex Gibney Alex Proyas Alexander Payne Alfonso Cuarón Anand Tucker Andrew Adamson & Vicky Jenson Andrew Stanton Andy & Larry Wachowski Ang Lee Anthony Minghella Antoine Fuqua Anton Corbijn Ari Aster Baltasar Kormákur Banksy Ben Affleck Benjamin Statler Bennett Miller Ben Younger Bill Paxton Billy Ray Bong Joon Ho Brad Anderson Brad Bird Brad Silberling Brian Koppelman & David Levien Bruno Barreto Burr Steers Byron Howard Cameron Crowe Casey Affleck Celine Song Chad Stahelski Chan-wook Park Charlie Kaufman Charlie McDowell Chris & Paul Weitz Chris Caldwell Chris McKay Chris Wilcha Chris Williams Christopher Guest Christopher McQuarrie Christopher Nolan Christos Nikou Clint Eastwood Colin Trevorrow Cord Jefferson Craig Gillespie Craig Zobel Curtis Hanson D.J. Caruso Damien Chazelle Dan Myrick Danièle Thompson Daniels Danny Boyle Danny Leiner Dan Rush Darren Aronofsky Daryl Wein David Ayer David Burton Morris David Cronenberg David Fincher David Gordon Green David Koepp David Leitch David Mackenzie David Mamet David O. Russell David Robert Mitchell Denis Villeneuve Dennis Dugan Doug Liman Drew Barrymore Duncan Jones Edgar Wright Ed Sanchez II Edward Zwick Elijah Bynum Emerald Fennell Emmanuel Osei-Kuffour Ethan Coen Fenton Bailey & Randy Barbato Forest Whitaker Frank Oz Gary Winick Gene Stupnitsky George Clooney George Lucas George Nolfi Geremy Jasper Glenn Ficarra Glenn Triggs Gore Verbinski Greg Mottola Greta Gerwig Guillermo del Toro Guy Ritchie Henry Rubin & Dana Shapiro Isaac Ezban Ivan Reitman J.P. Schaefer Jake Kasdan James Cameron James Gray James Gunn James Mangold James Ward Byrkit Jared Hess Jason Reitman Jay Roach Jean-Pierre Jeunet Jeff Rowe Jeff Tomsic Jennifer Kent Jeremy Saulnier Jesse Eisenberg Jesse Peretz Joel & Ethan Coen Joel Schumacher Joe Swanberg Joe Wright John Crowley John Duigan John Hamburg John Krasinski John Landis John Lee Hancock John Requa John Waters Jonathan Demme Jonathan Glazer Jonathan Goldstein Jonathan Levine Jon Watts Jordan Peele Joseph Kosinski Judd Apatow Julian Schnabel Julio Torres Justin Benson Justine Triet Kay Cannon Kenneth Lonergan Kenya Barris Kerry Conran Kevin Macdonald Kevin Phillips Kevin Rodney Sullivan Kevin Smith Kimberly Pierce Kristoffer Borgli Lars von Trier Lasse Hallström Lee Tamahori Liev Schreiber Lila Neugebauer Lorcan Finnegan Luca Guadagnino Lynne Ramsay M. Night Shyamalan Marcel Langenegger Mark Mylod Mark Pellington Mark Waters Martin McDonagh Martin Scorsese Mary Harron Matthew Bright Matthew Vaughn Matt Reeves Matt Stone Max Barbakow Michael Bay Michael Lembeck Michael Mann Michael McCullers Michael Moore Michael Ritchie Michael Schwartz Michel Gondry Mike Flanagan Mike Nichols Morgan J. Freeman Morten Tyldum Neil LaBute Neill Blomkamp Nicholas Stoller Nicolas Winding Refn Niels Mueller Noah Baumbach Oliver Stone Oliver Thompson Olivia Wilde Olivier Assayas Patty Jenkins Paul Feig Paul Greengrass Paul Haggis Paul Schrader Paul Thomas Anderson Paul Weitz Peter Berg Peter Jackson Peter Sollett Philip Kaufman Phillip Noyce Pierre Morel Quentin Tarantino Rawson Marshal Thurber Reginald Hudlin Reverge Anselmo Rian Johnson Richard Ayoade Richard Linklater Richard Shepard Ridley Scott Rob Bowman Robert Ben Garant Robert De Niro Robert Lee King Robert Rodriguez Robert Schwentke Rod Lurie Roger Donaldson Roger Michell Roland Emmerich Roman Polanski Ron Howard Rose Glass Ryan Murphy Safdie Brothers Sam Esmail Sam Mendes Sarah Adina Smith Scott Derrickson Scott Walker Sean Baker Seth Gordon Shane Carruth Shawn Levy Sidney Lumet Spike Jonze Spike Lee Stephen Frears Steven Soderbergh Steven Spielberg Steve Pink Sydney Pollack Sylvester Stallone Taika Waititi Tamara Jenkins Terry Zwigoff Thomas McCarthy Tim Burton Timur Bekmambetov Todd Field Todd Haynes Todd Phillips Todd Solondz Tony Scott Trey Parker Troy Miller Tyler Nilson Vince Gilligan Wes Anderson Yimou Zhang Yorgos Lanthimos Zach Braff Zack Snyder Zeek Earl Zoe Lister-Jones

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      Television Reviews
      Your Friends & Neighbors: Season 1

      July 3, 2025

      Television Reviews
      The Last of Us: Season 2

      June 24, 2025

      Television Reviews
      MobLand: Season 1

      June 13, 2025

      Good / Bad Commercial
      The More You Know: How to Pronounce “Comfortable”…

      June 10, 2025

      Television Reviews
      The Studio: Season 1

      June 3, 2025

      Television Reviews
      The Residence: Season 1

      May 30, 2025

      Television Reviews
      Your Friends & Neighbors: Season 1

      July 3, 2025

      Television Reviews
      The Last of Us: Season 2

      June 24, 2025

      Television Reviews
      MobLand: Season 1

      June 13, 2025

      Television Reviews
      The Studio: Season 1

      June 3, 2025

      Television Reviews
      The Residence: Season 1

      May 30, 2025

      Television Reviews
      Zero Day

      April 30, 2025

      Good / Bad Commercial
      The More You Know: How to Pronounce “Comfortable”…

      June 10, 2025

      Good / Bad Commercial
      Bad Commercial: Mattress Firm “Jumbled Up”

      August 10, 2023

      Good / Bad Commercial
      Good Commercial: JUBLIA “Dad’s Toenails”

      February 20, 2023

      Good / Bad Commercial
      Bad Commercial: J.G. Wentworth “Living at Home”

      December 19, 2021

      Good / Bad Commercial
      Bad Commercial: Apple iPhone 12 “Fumble”

      April 15, 2021

      Good / Bad Commercial
      Good Commercial: GEICO “Tag Team Helps With Dessert”

      March 15, 2021

  • Music
    • MusicAlbum ReviewsThe Music ListConcert Reviews
      Album Reviews
      Lifeguard: Ripped and Torn

      June 28, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Cameron Winter: Heavy Metal

      June 17, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Mclusky: the world is still here and so…

      June 16, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Origami Angel: Feeling Not Found

      June 12, 2025

      Album Reviews
      PUP: Who Will Look After the Dogs?

      June 2, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Star 99: Gaman

      May 12, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Lifeguard: Ripped and Torn

      June 28, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Cameron Winter: Heavy Metal

      June 17, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Mclusky: the world is still here and so…

      June 16, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Origami Angel: Feeling Not Found

      June 12, 2025

      Album Reviews
      PUP: Who Will Look After the Dogs?

      June 2, 2025

      Album Reviews
      Star 99: Gaman

      May 12, 2025

      The Music List
      The Grunge Diaspora

      August 15, 2024

      The Music List
      I Still Own a Lot of CDs

      June 13, 2024

      The Music List
      Top Listens 2023

      January 1, 2024

      The Music List
      In Defense of: OMC’s “How Bizarre”

      July 18, 2021

      The Music List
      Top 25 Influential Rock Albums

      May 1, 2020

      The Music List
      In Defense Of: Ruben Studdard’s “Sorry 2004”

      December 29, 2019

      Concert Reviews
      The Get Up Kids @ Starland Ballroom

      February 27, 2025

      Concert Reviews
      The Dirty Nil @ White Eagle Hall

      January 26, 2025

      Concert Reviews
      The Beths @ White Eagle Hall

      September 26, 2024

      Concert Reviews
      Pearl Jam @ MSG

      September 9, 2024

      Concert Reviews
      Cloud Nothings @ (Le) Poisson Rouge

      May 15, 2024

      Concert Reviews
      Band of Horses @ The Wellmont Theater

      February 13, 2024

  • Movies
    • Movie Reviews
      Mountainhead

      July 4, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Fountain of Youth

      June 24, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      A Different Man

      June 10, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Problemista

      May 22, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Flipside

      May 4, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      The Gorge

      March 2, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      A Real Pain

      January 31, 2025

  • Books
    • Book Reviews
      Trust

      June 19, 2025

      Book Reviews
      Razorblade Tears

      May 24, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Plot

      March 14, 2025

      Book Reviews
      Maximum Bob

      February 17, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Sympathizer

      January 6, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Zone of Interest

      July 12, 2024

      Book Reviews
      Klara and the Sun

      April 13, 2024

  • Podcasts
    • Podcast Reviews
      The Wedding Scammer

      March 1, 2025

      Podcast Reviews
      Search Engine

      November 27, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Hysterical

      August 30, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      60 Songs That Explain the ’90s

      March 31, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Otherworld

      February 29, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Behind the Bastards

      February 13, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Time Crisis

      January 26, 2024

  • Booze & Grub
    • Booze & Grub ReviewsBooze & Grub: NYCBooze & Grub: NJThe NYC Booze & Grub GraveyardThe NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Mambo Cuban Restaurant & Lounge Harrison

      May 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Westville Hudson

      April 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Five Guys – Midtown West

      January 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Jaz Indian Cuisine

      December 23, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Just Salad – Hudson Square

      November 13, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Quality Pizza Co. Midtown

      September 10, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Mambo Cuban Restaurant & Lounge Harrison

      May 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      SGD Dubu So Gong Dong Tofu & BBQ…

      May 9, 2025

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      August 9, 2022

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The Press Box Restaurant & Pub

      August 3, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Natureworks – Midtown

      May 6, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The National Bar & Dining Rooms

      April 10, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Hillstone – Midtown

      March 5, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Connolly’s Pub & Restaurant – 5th Ave.

      February 12, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      July 21, 2024

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Scala del Nonna

      February 15, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Diesel & Duke – Montclair

      January 30, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Ruthie’s Bar-B-Q & Pizza

      September 14, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Junior’s Cheesesteaks & Shakes

      December 21, 2020

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Vanillamore

      June 13, 2020

  • Randomness
    • Travel Reviews
    • Video Game Reviews
    • Product Reviews
    • Odd Finds
    • Diary