Greenwich Village

Cuba

Cuba

When I first attended a boozy brunch at Cuba we were not legally allowed to visit that country as Americans. And, honestly, I’m not even…

Carroll Place

Carroll Place

I somehow walked by Kenny’s Castaways probably around a million times in my early life and never went inside. Something about the joint repelled me. Maybe…

XR Bar

XR Bar

[CLOSED] What’s going on here? Good question. We’re not sure the proprietors of XR Bar know either. What’s with the fortuneteller? What’s with the weird…

Vol de Nuit

Vol de Nuit

Belgians must think they’re soooo superior. Why else would they open these bars where all they serve is Belgian beers? Where’s the Bud? Where are…

Village Ma

Village Ma

[CLOSED] We didn’t technically eat here. We didn’t technically drink here. We do know that they don’t appreciate people barfing in their bathroom, though. Don’t…

Village

Village

[CLOSED] Anybody who tells you stars are just normal people like you and me has obviously never sat next to Patricia Clarkson at a restaurant….

Tio Pepe

Tio Pepe

Arrrriba! Sorry, I have to start all my horrendous Spanish/Mexican reviews with some trite Spanish cliché. It’s a problem, and I’ll work on it (look…

Slaughtered Lamb

Slaughtered Lamb

Another useless theme restaurant gone horribly awry. Who told these people that death makes people hungry? Decorated in an English dungeon fashion, we assume they…

Provence

Provence

[CLOSED] Who doesn’t love the French? Well, that can of worms aside, who doesn’t love comfortable restaurants with good service and good food? I think…

Polly Esther’s

Polly Esther’s

[CLOSED] Kill me. Kill me now. As if living through the seventies wasn’t bad enough, now we need to go some place with a bunch…

Peculier Pub

Peculier Pub

One surveyor claims he drank an elephant piss beer from Pakistan — and we don’t doubt it. This place has a menu as long as…

Otoo

Otto Enoteca Pizzeria

I can’t hear the name Otto without thinking about the worst mascot in college sports history. I’m speaking, of course, about the smiling piece of…

Oliver's Bar and Grill

Oliver’s Bar and Grill

[CLOSED] Somehow they’ve taken the space that was the dreadful Barney Mac’s and super-sucked it. I mean I find it amazing that any place that…

Off the Wagon

Off the Wagon

The only memorable thing about this place is the foosball table — and the fact nobody can remember where it is. Maybe that’s testament to…

North Square Lounge

North Square Lounge

“I don’t see color; I’m a social scientist.” True words spoken by a pretentious little prick sitting next to us at this lame excuse for…

Minetta Tavern

Minetta Tavern (II)

I had only been to this joint once in my life. And I recall it being dark and shabby and somewhat on the depressing, retirement…

Minetta Tavern

Minetta Tavern

[CLOSED] Reopened: Minetta Tavern (II) The fact that this thing is just getting its place on The Survey in late 2007 is pretty funny. I’ve…

MacDougal St. Ale House

MacDougal St. Ale House

Hide the babies, lock up the women and get your daughters to a nunnery or something, I’m gonna drop the “s” bomb… SERENDIPITY. That’s right,…

Lupa

Lupa Osteria Romana

Expectations are a bitch. Not that I knew exactly what to expect from the red-headed fat dude with the ponytail who loves to serve organ…