Times Square

Zest

Zest

[CLOSED] Sometimes I order things that taste better than they sound on paper. Ordering the lemon chicken sandwich from Zest was just such an experience….

Yoshinoya

Yoshinoya

[CLOSED] Now the Japanese are sending us their fast food crap. Yes, this is the McDonald’s of the land of the rising sun. Using all…

Wrapsody

Wrapsody

[CLOSED] You easterners have this apprehension about eating anything called a wrap. You think it’ll make you soft, faggy and somehow align you with California-like…

Wok & Roll

Wok & Roll

[CLOSED] Straight from the malls of middle America and into your home comes Wok & Roll. This food court staple is Chinese food for areas…

Wholesome Wraps

Wholesome Wraps

[CLOSED] I’m still trying to figure out how a tortilla filled with cubes of cheese could technically be “healthy” or “wholesome,” but I’m the same…

Virgil’s Real BBQ

Virgil’s Real BBQ

One of the most satisfying meat pits in the city that will bring out your inner cannibal with its fine, but unattractive dishes. After all,…

Village 38

Village 38

I’ll have the napalm panini, please. Oh, sorry, that’ Village 26. Perhaps I’ll take the John McCain kebab. What, they don’t have that either? Perhaps…

Texas Texas

Texas Texas

[CLOSED] There’s nothing like a little Southern flavor in the middle of every epileptic’s nightmare, Time Square. Assumedly constructed to draw in foreign tourists with…

Teleon Cafe

Téleon Café

Directly across the street from The New York Times building, Teleon definitely serves its share of commie pinko bastards. No, seriously, whom do these liberal…

T.J. Keane’s Pub

T.J. Keane’s Pub

[CLOSED] Of all the scary, generic Irish joints in a city full of scary, Irish joints, this one may be hands down the most depressing….

Subway (Times Square)

Subway (Times Square)

This place is a mess. Apparently Papa John’s Pizza has moved into the same space, making the already weird restaurant even weirder. The front door…

Social

Social

There is apparently a whole mess of stuff going on at this bar that I had no idea about. They claim to have like twenty-two…

Show Nightclub

Show Nightclub

[CLOSED] I think my voice is just coming back. I do speak with a pretty pronounced rasp in my throat now, but at least I…

Scruffy Duffy’s

Scruffy Duffy’s

[CLOSED] Addendum [hey, things change] Okay, we admit that our original impression of this joint was slightly skewed by the time of day and day…

Schnipper's

Schnipper’s

It’s interesting to me that they would open a burger joint in the New York Times building. That definitely seems like more of a Fox…

Ruby Foo’s Times Square

Ruby Foo’s Times Square

[CLOSED] Despite its schizophrenic menu and touristy locale, Ruby Foo’s never seems to disappoint for a visual experience that is somehow both over and underwhelming…

Robert Emmett's

Robert Emmett’s

[CLOSED] I’m sure I’m supposed to know who Robert Emmett is. Is he another drunk poet? One of those dudes in the blue jumpsuits who…

Ranch 1 Times Square II

Ranch 1 (Times Square II)

[CLOSED] The once mighty chicken chain has been relegated to utter sadness. This particular franchise is literally stuck in the back of a bodega. I…

Ranch 1 (Times Square)

Ranch 1 (Times Square)

[CLOSED] We seem to recall this being an inexpensive place to eat. While it’s still on the cheap side, you could certainly hit the local…

Playwright Celtic Pub

Playwright Celtic Pub

It’s always interesting when a bar owner feels the need to take what is essentially a generic, personalityless joint and open another location under the…