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What If…?: Season 1

by mr. hipster December 1, 2021
December 1, 2021
What If...?
70
What If...?
Genre: Superhero Series
Service: Disney+
Season Year: 2021
Watch: Disney+

I’m not sure I have a handle on this whole Marvel universe thing. Like why is this alt-history cartoon part of that universe? Is it canon? Who is that giant baby-looking thing with Jeffrey Wright’s voice floating around narrating shit? Is he watching everything that happens in the multiverse, but we’ve never seen him before? Does he watch Chris Hemsworth shower? It’s all creepy and strange and I’m unsure why they’d do any of this other than to give another group of writers some fun stuff to make up. Like any show could It’s a Wonderful Life it and give you the alt if someone was never born. Or someone else got the super soldier shot. Or if Thor was just a drunk idiot. Or like if Ross was a stud and there were black people in the New York Friends or Seinfeld world.

In other words, there is an infinite number of possibilities. But the creators of the series — which is essentially a series of nine different “what if” tales — didn’t really get that wacky with it. Maybe there are some guardrails in this universe that I’m not aware of, but some of the episodes just felt like strange, incremental changes that I’m sure where shocking and amazing for super-fans. But for me, some of them were super-meh. But more than that, I didn’t really get how or why they chose certain characters to change or mess with. And to what end? Like is the Thor in the movies now going to be a moron? Probably not. So why the dalliance if not to just further exploit the Disney I.P.? Which I suppose is the same thing they’re doing with Star Wars, what with the 47 different properties streaming on the Disney+ platform. Though Tony Stark on What If…? is still Tony Stark. But maybe in a different universe? Whereas some random Rebel is just that dude and not a canon character like Luke or Han. So it’s different.

And if you can just do whatever because there are multiple and infinite universes, what are the stakes? If there’s a zombie apocalypse and everyone is going to die, why do we care? That’s universe x134 and we live in x178 where things are just hunky-dory. It’s fun, sure, but it feels fleeting and insignificant. Mostly because in the next episode we’re on to another story presumably in another universe. Where people are no longer zombies. They do try to tie some things together in a penultimate and finale episode, but I honestly started to lose track of where our ultimate baddie, Ultron’s, “home” universe actually is. And what is a home universe anyway? And why can he now punch the aforementioned baby.

Look, this whole thing is an attempt to spend some time with Hipster Jr. Jr. I’m not sure she was so into this particular Marvel property, but she seemed to at least know more about the history of all this than I did. I admit to pausing several times to ask “Now, who is that dude?” Sometimes she sort of knew. Sometimes she just shrugged and we moved on. Because nothing means anything when nobody can really die and worlds are just there to entertain us in our safe universe over here. At least that’s my takeaway. And maybe why I never read comics. I’m just too much of a stodgy a-hole when it comes to continuity. And in the What If…? universe, that’s just not a thing.

2021Andy SerkisAngela BassettBenedict CumberbatchBenedict WongBenicio Del ToroBradley WhitfordCarrie CoonChadwick BosemanChris HemsworthClancy BrownClark GreggCobie SmuldersDisney+Don CheadleEvangeline LillyJeff GoldblumJeffrey WrightJeremy RennerJon FavreauJosh BrolinKat DenningsKurt RussellLake BellLeslie BibbMark RuffaloMarvelMichael B. JordanMichael DouglasNatalie PortmanPaul BettanyPaul RuddRachel McAdamsSamuel L. JacksonSebastian StanSeth GreenStanley TucciSuperhero SeriesTaika WaititiTilda SwintonToby JonesTom Hiddleston
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      Cloud Nothings @ (Le) Poisson Rouge

      May 15, 2024

      Concert Reviews
      Band of Horses @ The Wellmont Theater

      February 13, 2024

  • Movies
    • Movie Reviews
      Mickey 17

      July 22, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Mountainhead

      July 4, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Fountain of Youth

      June 24, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      A Different Man

      June 10, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Problemista

      May 22, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      Flipside

      May 4, 2025

      Movie Reviews
      The Gorge

      March 2, 2025

  • Books
    • Book Reviews
      Trust

      June 19, 2025

      Book Reviews
      Razorblade Tears

      May 24, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Plot

      March 14, 2025

      Book Reviews
      Maximum Bob

      February 17, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Sympathizer

      January 6, 2025

      Book Reviews
      The Zone of Interest

      July 12, 2024

      Book Reviews
      Klara and the Sun

      April 13, 2024

  • Podcasts
    • Podcast Reviews
      The Wedding Scammer

      March 1, 2025

      Podcast Reviews
      Search Engine

      November 27, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Hysterical

      August 30, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      60 Songs That Explain the ’90s

      March 31, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Otherworld

      February 29, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Behind the Bastards

      February 13, 2024

      Podcast Reviews
      Time Crisis

      January 26, 2024

  • Booze & Grub
    • Booze & Grub ReviewsBooze & Grub: NYCBooze & Grub: NJThe NYC Booze & Grub GraveyardThe NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Falafel Hut

      July 12, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      McDonald’s (West Village)

      July 10, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      McDonald’s (West Village)

      July 10, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Westville Hudson

      April 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Five Guys – Midtown West

      January 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Jaz Indian Cuisine

      December 23, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Just Salad – Hudson Square

      November 13, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Falafel Hut

      July 12, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Mambo Cuban Restaurant & Lounge Harrison

      May 23, 2025

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      August 9, 2022

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The Press Box Restaurant & Pub

      August 3, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Natureworks – Midtown

      May 6, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The National Bar & Dining Rooms

      April 10, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Hillstone – Midtown

      March 5, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Connolly’s Pub & Restaurant – 5th Ave.

      February 12, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      July 21, 2024

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Scala del Nonna

      February 15, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Diesel & Duke – Montclair

      January 30, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Ruthie’s Bar-B-Q & Pizza

      September 14, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Junior’s Cheesesteaks & Shakes

      December 21, 2020

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Vanillamore

      June 13, 2020

  • Randomness
    • Travel Reviews
    • Video Game Reviews
    • Product Reviews
    • Odd Finds
    • Diary