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Cafeteria

by mr. hipster June 24, 2007
June 24, 2007
Cafeteria
69

CafeteriaHere, once again, is a restaurant at which I didn’t eat a thing. I just kind of sat back with a beer and soaked in the gay. It’s not as if I’m a burly mountain man or anything, but the clientele at this Chelsea eatery did kind of have me feeling like a big frat jerk. Perhaps that’s why they banished us to the basement space, and only sent a server down accidentally at one point to most likely retrieve a mop or something from the utility closet. The booth we sat in could only be likened to the weird half-shell tilt-a-whirl ride that one finds at like church carnivals. It’s probably a false memory, but the all-white modern Ikea look of the place just screamed theme bar to me. And what’s a better theme than a space-aged carnival? I suppose that thematically the food is, well, all about the cafeteria. Literally serving pumped up, high quality versions of junk you’d find in your average school cafeteria (mac ‘n cheese, meatloaf, etc.), it allows trendoid Manhattanites to live like the rest of us schnooks–or at least pretend to. It’s kind of like ordering that PBR at the bar that’s paying $15,000 a month in rent and pretending you’re in a shanty shack in Alabama. Three cheers for kitsch. My beer tasted like beer, and eventually people filtered downstairs to join us, but there was a weird homogeny I saw down there that was not repeated upstairs when I ran up to use the restaurant. While we were a relatively somber group, the main floor was a little more, uh, happy. Maybe it was the lack of natural light. Maybe it was just the feeling of being a pariah. All I know is that my outlook drastically improved when, after one beer, I left to go get a nice greasy burger down the street at Peter McManus. [MF]


119 7th Ave.
212/414-1717
cafeteriagroup.com


 

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    • Booze & Grub ReviewsBooze & Grub: NYCBooze & Grub: NJThe NYC Booze & Grub GraveyardThe NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews
      Mambo Cuban Restaurant & Lounge Harrison

      May 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      CAVA – 350 Hudson

      June 19, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Westville Hudson

      April 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Five Guys – Midtown West

      January 25, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Jaz Indian Cuisine

      December 23, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Just Salad – Hudson Square

      November 13, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NYC
      Quality Pizza Co. Midtown

      September 10, 2024

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Seoul Bistro

      July 4, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Ralph’s Pizzeria and Italian Restaurant

      June 27, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Rooster’s Nashville Hot Chicken

      June 18, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Oso Felipe

      June 6, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      Mambo Cuban Restaurant & Lounge Harrison

      May 23, 2025

      Booze & Grub Reviews: NJ
      SGD Dubu So Gong Dong Tofu & BBQ…

      May 9, 2025

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      August 9, 2022

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The Press Box Restaurant & Pub

      August 3, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Natureworks – Midtown

      May 6, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      The National Bar & Dining Rooms

      April 10, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Hillstone – Midtown

      March 5, 2021

      The NYC Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Connolly’s Pub & Restaurant – 5th Ave.

      February 12, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard: Gone Before Their…

      July 21, 2024

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Scala del Nonna

      February 15, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Diesel & Duke – Montclair

      January 30, 2023

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Ruthie’s Bar-B-Q & Pizza

      September 14, 2021

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Junior’s Cheesesteaks & Shakes

      December 21, 2020

      The NJ Booze & Grub Graveyard
      Vanillamore

      June 13, 2020

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