I’ll probably never get to the Greek Isles. I don’t like the sun all that much, and the E! Wild On Mykonos episode looked like a big, gay Olympic carnival to me. Luckily, the second best thing to Greece is merely a subway ride away in beautiful, sunny Astoria. Okay, there may not be bronzed brunettes in skimpy thongs or a neighboring nation stuffed full of fun-hating Muslims, but this little piece of Greece has all the fresh fish and delicious dips one could ever want. The grilled octopus appetizer is almost worth the trip alone. Fish served whole (complete with heads and tails) practically melt in your mouth. The lamb–despite Mr. Hipster’s aversion to eating cute, baby animals–is supposed to be some of the best around. Granted, the awful house wine will give you a headache almost the moment it touches your lips, and the prices are a little higher than we would have liked, but you’ll leave feeling like a lowly mortal after a visit from the Greek food gods. [MF]

34-21 34th Ave.