Pizzeria Uno


One of six of this chain of Chicago style pizza joints in Manhattan, this one is particularly depressing and bizarre. With its storefront right on 86th Street, you’d figure it would be a neighborhood favorite with families and frat boys alike, but most who peer through the front window squint with confusion over the group of zombie waiters and lifeless diners who inhabit the cave-like interior. The place feels like it was originally built as a grain silo or something, and really doesn’t do anything to either enhance or satisfy your appetite. It feels as though there is still the remnants of a barn lingering about the place. It may be what we think was sawdust on the floor (one theory is that the strangely unprofessional staff hasn’t swept in about 4 years), or it may be the unnecessary 80 foot ceilings. In any case, the butter drenched pizza is served to you by what appears to be the manager (as his mostly stoned teenage waitstaff wander around looking confused) and eaten at one of a bunch of oddly placed tables and booths. Preternaturally filling, two slices of the small, thick crust pizza ought to do it for anyone under 200 lbs. This place could host a great haunted house on Halloween , ‘cuz it’s a freak show every other day of the year. [MF]

220 E 86th St.